Tonight I went to orchestra practice. I suck. There are some days when I wonder what on earth I thought when I joined this group. Tonight was one of them.
Actually tonight I feel like I suck and besides my feet are tired from standing on a cement floor for 1 1/2 hours.
I practice the songs – there are 8 or 9 that we have been working since September. I can play them in the privacy of my own home — cause then I can go nice and slow. Very slow. Then I get to practice and hit about every fourth note — if it is an open string. I do the open strings quite well actually.
I know that I have improved a whole lot. Remarkably actually. When you start at zero you can only get better.
I think I am at the level where now I know how bad I really am and how much better I have to get to make this instrument sound like it should. I told one of my fellow bassists, “Next year I will be much better” She insists that I am doing great and that she can’t believe how well I am doing. I would like to believe her. I will keep on.
Maybe this is one of those learning plateaus. Well, I won’t quit but I hope I do not make the whole orchestra look bad at the music festival and concert.