Last night I sat with a committee of friends from my church talking of my gifts and calling to ministry. Its part of the required references needed to apply to seminary. To North Park at least. North Park seems a very thorough way to check out people who apply. I suppose it helps the committee at the other end to know who will make good candidates for the program of studies and for the end result of developing pastors.
It is hard to sit and make a list of gifts I have for ministry. Maybe it is just my nature but I am more likely to be aware of my failings, my areas of non-giftedness, than my gifts. It seems weird to be saying,”I am good at…, I am gifted at…” And then add into the equation that these are not just my personal gifts but the gifts that I believe are going to help me to minister to people in a semi-official sort of way on behalf of a church or organization.
So, that is what I was doing last night. Then I left it in their hands to discuss what they see in me, to recommend me – or not. They already know me pretty well so I don’t suppose I threw them too many surprises.
The experience of sharing what I have learned about myself over the past years and throughout my life was good. It is fairly intense and exhilarating to share my personal story. I don’t get to sit and talk about these things – about how God has moved in my life to get me to where I am now – with very many people. Most would just think I am weirdly “religious” and not grasp or understand the deep relationship with God that has developed over my life time. The friends I sat and talked last night, know God too, even though each of us has a uniqueness in our own relationships with him.
So here we go. One more step in the process of applying to seminary checked off. My forms are ready to send off. I’d better get down to more study on the Greek. There is the plain old hard work of studying to face.